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July 12, 2006
these are the people in my neighborhood
It's quite the shocker going from bland, suburban Fremont to the middle of downtown Oakland. It's not exactly the hood here, but it's not Piedmont, either.
I've been here long enough so that there are some familiar faces.
First is Crazy Hair Lady. She has terrible fashion sense, and she wears three non-matching wigs on her head. At the same time. I swear one of these days I'm going to sit on the corner (not disturbing the drug dealers, of course) with a camera and get a picture of her. It's really quite something.
There's the little old Asian couple next door who are always outside washing the sidewalk. It sort of drives me nuts. He's nice, she's a little crabby. Today as I was walking down the street to move my car, I saw her sitting in her living room window, plucking her eyebrows.
No neighborhood is complete without drug dealers. My guy (I don't need to buy drugs, I just get contact highs from the dope smokers next door) wears the same ugly black and red leather outfit every day, and has a crazy spiky hairdo. I saw him near the BART station the other day. I waved, but he didn't recognize me.
And then there's my favorite - the crabby Asian lady at the cleaner's. The first time I went there to get Nathan's shirts laundered, I asked for light starch. No problem. The next time I went in, Her Royal Crabbiness was there.
Me: Oh, I'd like light starch, please.
HRC: Medium starch.
Me: No, light starch is fine.
HRC: You want medium or heavy starch.
Me: No, I'd like light starch, please.
HRC: NO light starch. Medium or heavy! (she is yelling now)
Me: How about medium starch?
HRC: Great! You pick up Thursday!
I love Oakland.
Comments
Sounds...flavorful. (.)(.)
Posted by: grace at July 13, 2006 6:05 AM
HRC reminds me of the fictional Chinese lady behind the drive up Chinese food window in Dude, Where's My Car? She always says, "And Then..." after whatever Jessie (Ashton Kutcher) orders, even when he is done ordering.
Only this is in real life...
Say hi to the dealer for me!
Posted by: bob at July 13, 2006 7:32 AM
Enjoyed visiting your blog.
We have a very similar Crabby Asian Lady at a local Chinese take out place. Conversations invariably go like this:
Me: "Hello, I want to make a take out order please."
Her: "OK, you talk."
Me: "One Buddhist Delight, one mu shu pork and one oder of Crab Rangoon."
Her: (repats order very quickly and then ... ) "Food ready 15 minute!!! You come now!!! Wait for food, no get cold!"
For some reason I can barely keep myself from saying, "Yes ma'am" instead of "Thank you."
But she is really very nice, and so is the rest of her family that runs the business. Good food too.
Your friend is really doing you a favor with "No light starch." That's just her way of saying, "Light starch looks wimpy."
Posted by: dez at August 1, 2006 8:38 AM